New Year's is almost here! Yea, yea, yea!!! I'm excited!  It feels good to be excited about something again. Christmas was a very mellow time this year. It usually is, but this year a little bit more than usual. Maybe because everyone was pretty much broke this year and it didn't really matter. It may have put a damper on the number of gifts, but not on the time spent with my family. But that's not the most imporant part; it was Jesus' Birthday and I am ever so greatful for what He's done in my life.

A few days before Christmas I was hanging out with my aunt, running some last minute errands and we were in the area of some family that I'm not too familiar with, so my aunt decided to stop by her aunt's house to check in since she hadn't spoken with them in about a year. So we pull up to this split-level, paint chipped house at the end of the street and my aunt got out of the car. I stayed. I didn't know where we were or who was in the house. When she got up to the door she motioned fro me to come in. When we got in the house the 3 people standing in the living room appeared to have not seen sunlight for quite some time.

Laid up on the couch was "Aunt Virgie" (my aunt's aunt), a man who I was not introduced to, and Althea (my aunt's cousin). Althea had no lower jaw, whatsoever! We sat don on a couch that was covered in old sales papers and junk mail. Althea started to tell us what she had been through in the last year.

It all started with some dental work, than there was a black spot on her face that she thought was the result of the dental work, then the black spot got bigger and started to hurt, then she went to the doctor to have it looked at and they ran several test that came back negative, then there were test done that confirmed cancer, then she was told that only a small portion of her jaw would be removed and that she wouldn't need chemo or radiation. When she awoke from surgery her entire lower jaw was gone and at the time we were meeting with her she had just finished 5 rounds of chemo and was getting ready fro radiation. 

Made me put what I thought were huge problems in my life into perspecive. 

Currently Watching Garden State By Zach Braff, Peter Sarsgaard, Natalie Portman see related

Maybe I should have nothing to do at work more often, then I would never neglect my Xanga again.

I can't wait for "Garden State" to come out on DVD. Horray for December 28th.

This movie is a great description of my current state in life.

Dear Venetta,

Despite your feelings of insignificance, you play a very vital role in the world; therefore, I would greatly appreciate it if you would get it together real soon!

~Your Life

Currently Playing Autobiography By Ashlee Simpson see related

- Love Me For Me

So, I got suckered into working the week after Christmas, as if I'm not already working my *ss off the week after finals. I guess I'll have a nice chunk of change for when school starts. No Biggie. I'm not really excited about the holidays, but I'm not sad either. I'm just praying nothing tragic happens to my family this year. My aunt's husband dying on Christmas Day, after they had only been married for 6 months, last year is enough grief to sustain us for years to come. I'm amaxed at how well my family bounces back and moves forward after things like this. It's wierd, and I hope no one takes this personally, but my dad's passing was my first REAL experience with death and eve since then it's been easier to deal with; maybe not easier, but all the other deaths I've experienced since didn't hurt half as bad. If anything, that one still hurts the worst.

Enough with the sadness already. I've been in a very good mood for weeks now. I had a little bit of a hiccp with my aunt's car accident, but she is doing fine. My mom is having a bit of a hard time at home with the finances, but her high spirits and positive attitude make me feel like everything is ok. I can't believe that lady. She is such an inspiration to me on how well you can perservere with faith.

Okay, so finals are over, and now I'm really a senior, but I am 3 semesters away from graduation. I've rushed all the way to the point that I'm at right now and now I want to take my time. Whatever. I don't know what I want to be involved in next year though. Maybe I'll try for RA. I don't know. The holiday's are going swell. No sad days as of yet. Quite excited about that, b/c this is usually an extremely hard time for me emotionally, but I'm doing okay even as we approach the BIG holiday.

So, I have this problem. I sometimes tell the guys that I like about my feelings for them; then they start to fade, I did this recently and I don't think that my feelings are fading, but I am so much more comfortable around him than I was before.  It's wierd, but I am not a normal person. I don't know which is wierder (is that a word?): me being comfortable enough to tell him or me becoming more comfortable around him because I told him. Like I said, I'm not normal; I don;t think either one of those answers are normal.

Well, "guy," you know who you are, and I think you're awesome...but you knew that already though.

Well, "keep it classy San Diego."